The feeling of betrayal…

One’s feeling is something so mysterious and yet so real. One’s relationship with one another carried the same theory. While I am sitting in front of computer and think back  about what had happened these past weeks, nothing really come up but the feeling of betrayal…

Finally at this point of my life, I truly understand the saying of “You’ll only find your true friends in time of hardship. Those who stick with you when you still have usable value and/or at the peak of your life may not be your true friends.”  I learn it now and I learn it the hard way. That feeling of betrayal is much more than angers and disappointments. I really thought that I would kick and scream but for all the honest reasons, none of that came to me. I felt no angers or disappointments or resentments. But the one feeling that I dread most did surface at full force: betrayal.

It was at that point of you really don’t want anything else to do with the person now or for the rest of your life. Is that the true meaning of “forgiven but not forgotten”? Perhaps. Can relationship that has been build twenty some odd years be comparable with that of one and half years? Perhaps. That’s probably be one answer that it will take me years to figure out why.

Feeling is fragile but then so is relationship. You might have the ability to try to hold on to it for that long but at one point along the road it will break and that’s probably the worst, especially if you are that person who has invert personality. I like to compare one’s relationship with others to a rubber band. No one is perfect, thus I can try to hold and pull the rubber band for so long. But at point of life, too much disappointments and betrayals, and my rubber band will snap. Unfortunately, that’s will also mean the end of that relationship – regardless of the nature of that relationship…  Is it a bad thing? Maybe yes, maybe not at all…